Malice Rants On...

okay, so i'm at home this morning, feeling like crap --- but better (thank you bill) and perusing the 18 million email addresses i've acquired (Demancey, change my email to this address) and listening to Stoph bemoan the death of the Dome (an idea that died more than a year ago) ....

in the background i hear katie couric (read: pixies on TV) interviewing a man who is getting ready to have his 3rd or 5th child -- i don't remember which, but it's a boy. Anyways, they've set up a website and are auctioning off the rights to name the child. Their hope is that a corporation will pay 500,000 or so to have the rights to name the child and maintain the copyrights to that child's name as he grows up.

Now this child has no special abilities, at least that they can detect while he's still in the womb, and the whole thing boils down to the last sentence to come out of the expecting father's mouth: "We're hoping that a corporation will look at this as an opportunity to continue their name and give our son the type of life we couldn't otherwise provide for him [sic]."

Kerunne -- you're the medical wiz. Is there precidence for this type of thing????

What is this BULLSHIT???? If you can't provide for that child, don't have one! I realize things happen, and sometimes you gotta just take the L and chalk it up to a learning experience, but how in god's name are you going to auction off your unborn child to the highest bidder??? Has the world really come to the point where people hold nothing -- including their own children -- sacred anymore?

I could rant and rave on how pissed off and disturbed i am by all this, but i think it'd be much more fun to think about the possible people who would buy the rights and actually name this child. Below are a few of my choice picks. Feel free to come up with some more and share .... --- with world-weary insolence --- Malice.

Possible baby names:

the obvious -- Microsoft, Explorer, Netscape, Windows, Word Perfect, Earthlink, Net Zero, MTV, Seagram's, Phillip Morris, Dow, GE, Gerber, yada yada yada

the around the way -- Friendly's, Baskin Robbins, A&P, Price Right, Darnell's Juke Joint and 24 Hour Convenience store (an actual spot in Greenville, SC), Polly Esta's Nightclub, (you get the picture))

those shameless enough to do it: Howard Stern, Rosie O'Donnel, Circle 9 Productions, and the 124 Empire, and Dale -- who would probably name the child after Mike Johnson and spend the child's life promoting him in clubs ... (hehehe)

okay, so the last couple were low blows, but they're funny --- and i wouldn't put anything past Stoph ..... *big ole hugs to my emceestopheles*

Peace & Respects......Demancey the 124ian